A Chinese and American walks into a Hunan restaurant...
XinXiangHui
Sarah took me to a popular chain restaurant, XinXiangHui. I love Hunan food, with the extreme chili and extreme oil..it's perfect! i don't even care if my tummy didn't. We had a unique fish dish with sprouts and a hong sao beef dish with some cold melon side dish. Quite yummy and filling. And we talked about tons of things about the local ladies and culture. I learned the following:1. not everyone here has multiple relationships, as i was led to believe. in fact, it occurs about as frequently as it does in the US, which i don't think is that frequently.
2. girls like to buy expensive nice clothes at the mall to show off to their friends more so than to impress the men. i thought this was funny.
3. girls are kinda vain here. it might be a big city thing but most chicks walk around in heels, skirts and dresses. i marvelled at the skill it takes to walk long distances, down stairs, thru puddles in heels. i complained that even my tennies give me blisters. but sarah made the comparison that it's probably comparable to the US.
4. many families here are modernized, meaning they are cool if their daughters date expats. their only objection is when the expat suggests they move back to their home country. this is a problem b/c girls here form very strong social networks of friends and family and to pluck them away is difficult for them.
5. premarital cohabitation isn't a big deal if you've known each other a long time and the parents know the guy. sarah started living with her bf 9 mos ago and they've dated for 4 years. they're pushing her to get married but she wanted to get a stable job and save money. kinda like most people i know. she told me about her friend dating an american who suggested they move in together after dating 2 mos. the parents did not approve b/c it was too soon not necessarily b/c he was white or they were unmarried. i get the feeling the chinese in america are more traditional than the ones here, which is interesting. my mom and gramma weren't too jazzed about me moving in w/ my man.
6. it's not really the norm for local girls to date expats b/c of the communication barrier. sure, the expats can speak chinese and the locals can speak some english, but they can't really communicate. just cuz you can speak the language doesn't mean you necessarily can appreciate the culture difference. she told me about a couple of her friends dating/married to expats and how one of them moved back from france to SH b/c she was so lonely over there. their marriage is in shambles.
7. people aren't that different here than the US. i have been making incorrect generalizations b/c it's easier but i am finding out most of my stereotypes aren't accurate and people are similar wherever i go.
8. i finally asked the question: why aren't chinese girls fat here??? i see them downing desserts like Dairy Queen, boba drinks, ice cream, all the time. I see them constantly eating out, with huge portions on their plate. Why why why?? sarah said although they may splurge one day of the week, they are mindful the rest of the week. ah..moderation, what a concept. :P
9. she showed me old high school and college pics and family pics and her bf pics. i must say, she used to look really pretty and young and i couldn't even recognize her! not saying she's ugly now but she looked really different. the scenery in the chengdu fotos are nice, she seemed really close to her gfs (she was def the prettiest), and her local bf...he wasn't bad looking! ok, another stereotype debunked. not all local guys are unattractive.
10. she's gonna take me shopping one of these weekends cus i don't know where the affordable boutiques are.
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