earth to Earth Day.

hug a tree.

of course, in shanghai, finding one will be a challenge.

marissa n aaron

saying goodbye..

to people you like sucks.
makes me sad.
but i always believed that if it's destiny
your roads will one day cross
and you will always meet again.

see you in EUR my friend.

follow me..

to sweden. (blog to follow)

but first,
an indefinite stop-over...
in new zealand...
weeeee..

see ya soon sunshine.

naked retreats..

was heaven in a forest of bamboo. i will never forget walking quietly in the bamboo forest, hearing nothing but my own footsteps, looking up at the tips of the shoots, looking down at the thick sturdy segmented stalks on the ground, all the while inhaling the fresh, cool, moist air that you only get after rainfall, deep into my lungs.

oh Moganshan, how i miss you so. and your 3 legged dogs and cat.

Oh, the places you'll go!

We're trying to figure where we want our last Asia travel destination to be before we leave shanghai. But i am coming to realize there are just too many to choose from! Angkor, Cambodia really caught my eye. I always remember seeing pictures of the temples in mags and on TV but when I did a search online of Must-see places in Asia, i was pretty blown away by Angkor Wat. So Siem Reap is probably one of my first picks. Then there's Vietnam. Of all SE Asia destinations, airfare is the cheapest there. So cheap, that I know two people who purchased tickets and went there alone this week! (it's a chinese/easter holiday week) I thought Halong bay would be a great place to chill and soak in nature, so I pick Hanoi over the busy Ho Chi Minh City. Then there's Bali Island. My coworker went there last year and LOVED it. She said the people were the most gracious and hospitable that she's ever met! Plus, how can i resist an island in Indonesia? Kuala Lampur in Malaysia is a pretty cheap flight but my fear is it will be too busy and crowded and give me claustrophobic flashbacks of SH, except with nice and friendly folk.

We have to leave by May 1 due to dkf's visa. We may not be able to move to Sweden just yet so will need to stall somewhere, hopefully idyllic. Originally I thought Thailand would be a great, relaxing cheap place to hang out, but with all the civil unrest, that might be a bad idea.

Oh where to go, where to go? Dr. Seuss, please tell me!

thought of the day

whenever i get emails and read blogs about others, and i hear all about retirements, divorces, deaths, health declines, and job changes, i always think to myself, "wow, my life is pretty boring. nothing changes a whole lot from year to year." but then again, i would rather have no bad news to report than any news at all.

i can't tell you how much better it's been since the landlord thing blew over. i can finally breathe again. my chi, although over-worked and exhausted, is on its way to getting pure again...

so it ends up i will stay in SH til at least the end of april. i promised my bosses i would even stay til june if needed. hopefully it won't be needed. at least my rent is free. soon, i hope i will be too. :)

babies

i really enjoy playing with babies:
watching how 5 micro-expressions flash on their faces in 5 seconds
their pudgy fingers and thighs
how they lay there peacefully as they are bathed
how their arms and legs are always in motion
how they are so proud when they discover a new skill, like rolling over
how they stare at you endlessly because your face is so interesting to them
how watchful they are of the things around them
how they drink from the bottle but are still looking around the room
how they are fussy if they are in one position only because they are not in another position
how they giggle so much and their smiles are so wide
their unmistakable baby smell
their soft body parts
how they barely have toenails
how pink and white they are.

i love spending time with hannah mae. she makes me love babies oh so much.

what will i miss most about china?

~sichuan food-the shiznit is pretty sweeeeeet. especially the numbing water-cooked beef, my fave.
~gokohai shabu shabu. the best shabu ever.
~my awesome, kind and loyal local friends.
~cheap and accessible public transport.
~cheapness in general.
~its air accessibility to many asian countries.
~the interesting expat kids i meet and get to spend time with each week. and their gnarly names.
~my coworkers and bosses are really good people. the company has its heart in the right place.
~contract work. contract work. contract work.
~lots of opportunities you don't get elsewhere due to loose regulations of sorts. u can do all sorts of diverse stuff here. and i have, and i loved it.

what won't i miss:
everything else.

korea, sweden or canada?

after the debacle with psychobitch from hell, the phone rings and i say to dkf, it's the landlord or cop, i know it, and i won't answer it! I am so conditioned to my phone ringing and it being bad news or harassment after this whole incident I am sorta traumatized by my ringtone. I think I will change it. But i look at the phone and it appears to be an int'l call. dkf figures out that it is from korea so i pick up.

so i got a salaried job offer from the position in seoul today. i spoke with them a couple weeks ago and they weren't sure if they could offer me that, but would contact me again later. today they did. i wasn't happy with their offer and less than enchanted about having to make our next home still in asia. to be honest, i need a break from asia. i have dreamed of living in europe for a while now but would settle even for n. america. being able to speak english freely would be a nice breath of fresh air. dkf has two potentials, one from sweden, one from canada. at this point, i would take either. but it's all about timing. we have to move out by mid-april, seoul wants me to start mid-april and we are trying to balance this with when we will get news from either of dkf's prospects. and dkf needs to leave the country by may 1 due to his visa situation.

there is a light at the end of this tunnel. i know that. i need to get out of china. asia, if possible. but the prospect of at least making seoul our new home brightens up my dreary china sky. the people there are helpful and seem kind. i know bad landlords come in many colors. let's hope our next one is the color of kindness.

The Hazards of Being a Shanghai Expat: Dangerous and Abusive Landlords

That will be the title of an article I hope to eventually write for a local SH magazine.

Many expats don't get the local Chinese flavor of life because they are quite insulated with their company packages, ayis, drivers, unlimited budgets, nice apartments they don't have to search and bargain for, English-speaking reps and never having to deal with sociopathic and assholey locals here who scam and bully you left and right. But one thing I am grateful for in our time here in SH is that we did get an authentic Chinese experience and this will make one fine chapter of my autobio someday. I have seen the depravity that exists in humankind, and let me tell you, it is not pretty.

I am at the tail-end of a 30+days debacle with the landlord from hell. Mind you, I have had some pretty bad landlords in the past, as I was recalling yesterday while reflecting on the situation. The question is, do I attract bad landlords, do they attract me, or do I just do very poor screening of landlords when I look for places to live? Most likely the third, I would say. But perhaps a little bit of the first 2 too.

As anyone I spoke with knows when I was apartment hunting, when I first saw the apartment, I loved it. dkf and I had just broken up and I wanted a calm, soothing place to come home to, to do my work, to enjoy the nice Fall weather. I wanted a nice feminine apartment in the French Concession, which was my favorite area in SH. When I met Jessica Wen, I knew something wasn't quite right, that she was extremely inflexible, almost OCD, picky, neurotic, overbearing, bossy, not open to any negotiation and cheaper than hell. But I ignored that instinct, or those judgment calls and decided I liked the apartment enough to tolerate her on an occasional basis. That was, until my washer broke over a month ago.

I called her to let her know the washer broke and the war began. She refused to fix it, would not let me deduct repair fees from my rent, accused me of breaking it on purpose, said it was not her responsibility as a landlord to fix it, did not fix and deal with the situation for over 30 days and mentally and verbally abused me and any of my friends that advocated for me. She was a nightmare. So 30 days later, the Whirlpool guy finally comes and decides the washer is unfixable. This angers her and she becomes more abusive and then threatening and dangerous. She verbally makes an agreement with me that if I move out at the end of the month, she will deduct one month's rent from my huge security deposit and refund the balance to me. She leaves.

But it wasn't over. An hour later, the real nightmare begins. Without warning, she comes back with 4 thugs to intimidate me and threaten me in order to get her rent money. I took the advice of my SH-nese colleague to withhold this month's rent until she resolved the washer issue; that was what sent her over the edge. She wanted her money BAD. She responded alright. Stupid me, I let them in thinking the group of people were perhaps the neighbor's friends. After I opened the door, I realized it was a throng of people including the landlord and they began following me to my front door and surrounding me. I began shouting, What do you want? Why are you here? Jessica then said she wanted her rent money. I said, didn't we already agree to that earlier? She said, well I change my mind. I told dkf who was inside the apartment what was happening. He then ran out, to where they were standing and shouted, "Go away! I will call the police!" and we both called 110. The police eventually came but were totally ineffective and scolded me and told me to pay rent. I tried to explain the situation but they were all Shanghainese and I wasn't and my Chinese just isn't elaborate enough to advocate or argue effectively. The arguing continued, the thugs continued to berate me, and eventually the cops told me I had to go down to the police station to file a report. I knew I needed a native Chinese speaker to go down there with me b/c I would not be able to explain my situation well. I frantically called my friend's lawyer friend, and my other 2 Chinese friends. I stalled as long as I could but the cops were becoming impatient. The cops eventually left and the thugs were outside waiting for me to go to the police station with them. Eventually, my dear friend's bro and his gf show up and I quickly explain the situation to him as we walk to the station. My other friend meets us at the station. And much later in the evening, my dear friend shows up to support me. It was the worst 7 hours of my life. The way disputes are dealt with in China is that police don't really do anything or mediate, they allow the two disputing parties to hash it out til both people agree, even if it takes all day. The one that is worn down quicker gives in. Though I was still in my pj's, had not eaten ALL day, was tired, worn out and traumatized, I was not willing to give up. We were at that station for 7 hours and bless my friends' hearts, they stuck by me the whole time. The main cop, Lt. Zhu, this asshole who clearly had a thing for my flirty landlord, wrote out a revised contract that would supercede the original one. By the time we signed it, it was around 8pm. I think I left my house around noon that day. My head hurt for 2 days thereafter.

But it wasn't over. I would return the house within 7 days so I had to find a place to live asap. My dear friend of course offered her house but it was way too far from work. We found a place and moved in in 3 days. I just wanted to get the hell out of that bad chi house. I could feel my energy getting so negative. We were also living in fear of the thugs coming back and breaking in and dkf had to stay in the apartment night and day to prevent that from happening. I was also fearful for his safety as he was there alone when I went to work and could not speak Chinese. It was so nice to move out to our larger, more modern apartment. But it was not over yet. On Friday we had to meet with the landlord and cop to return the apartment and for her inspection. This is where it got ugly..again. She brought her "property manager," an evil Chinese lady who spoke really good English. Together, she and Jessica picked at every imperfection in the apartment, really ridiculous shit. But there was no winning. The same cop was on her side. dkf got feisty. He said in English to Jessica, "you are a f---in cunt and need to die." Her prop manager, "Noko" translated to Jessica then started fighting with dkf in English. Then I had it in with her. I told her there was something called freedom of speech in America, and she said this is not America. I said that people can say whatever the hell they want. I told dkf to take a picture of Noko, then she threatened to sue saying one could not take a picture of a nonconsenting person. She said she would have her lawyer friend sue him. She tried to convince the cop to "teach dkf a lesson about respecting chinese law." Total psychobitch. Eventually we made dkf delete the photo of her but thanks to his awesome file recovery program, we were able to recover the deleted photo. We will be posting her foto and her wrongdoings on the SH expat forums forevermore. After a couple hours of arguing and BS, we signed another document then left.

But it still was not over. On Sunday we were to meet with the landlord and cop at the cop station to tally up the grand total and for her to refund my balance. As I predicted, things again did not go smoothly. dkf stood across the street to try to take discreet fotos of Jessica so we could post her fotos online. Except she saw him. We spent another few hours at the station, from her nickeling and diming me on my utility bills to her demanding dkf delete her fotos. He eventually did and showed his camera fotos to the cop to verify they were deleted. But then she began speaking SH-nese to the cop and it seemed like she was going to ask the cop to do something more drastic. We hurriedly left to avoid further confrontation.

But it wasn't over. Notice a theme? Minutes later, the cop calls me and demands I go back to the station b/c Jessica wanted to verify the photos were deleted, not just the cop. I insisted to the cop that the fotos were gone as he had seen but he said we had to go back, or I was on my own with the sec. deposit. He threatened me. Then we began to get paranoid about whether they could do something to dkf, prosecute him, confiscate his stuff, etc and dkf didn't want to go back. But I was just hoping she would verify the photos were gone then we leave. dkf made me call the cop back to give him a hard time, to insist Jessica pay for the taxi ride because we were only heading back there b/c of her. The cop yelled at me pretty distastefully, saying it's all OUR fault for causing this, not hers, I was not respecting him, I was being unreasonable, you can't take pics without people's consent, I have to go back. So we did. She checked the fotos but before we left, she and I got into another yelling match. She said something about me not trusting the cop, and I said, I don't trust you! And she said she didn't trust me. She said, I can't believe it has come to this. I said I couldn't believe it either all b/c of a washer. Then she said, yah I will buy you some new clothes and I said I don't see any new clothes on me! The cop then put his arm around her and took her away. He even called her an endearing name. I totally think they're sleeping together. Anyways, she is supposed to wire me my money within the next 3 days but chances are, I will never see it. At this point, it isn't even about the money. It's about reclaiming my peace of mind and positive chi.

God, I hope it's over.

This past month, I've been nervous, anxious, low energy, cranky, depressed, worried and unhappy and my chi is black. All because of having to deal with this sociopathic, mentally ill woman named Jessica Wen. I'm actually more angry at her posse, the ones that enable her to do such horrible things to expats. She can only do the things she does because there are people who support her and people who don't fight against her. We found info on her online and she has done this to other expats before. I know we can't stop her from continuing to do this to future expats, but at the very least, she didn't get everything she wanted out of me. And I made her work a little for her money. I have been emailing her info and part of our story to different expat groups hoping people can spread the word. Expats here often take this kind of abuse, thinking, oh, it's just China. NO! One thing I have learned about myself since I've moved to SH is how much I detest passivity. People need to stand up against what is wrong, even if it has always been that way.

Let's hope our next landlord is kind. I hope yours is too.

Peace out.

Seoul.

the depressing Gyeongbokgung Palace. 100% fake because the japanese pretty much burned it to ashes

i thought this was too funny

one of my favorite seoul moments, don't know why

chillin kids at the animation center. just pop in a vid and watch..

seoul tower

myeong dong-shopping epi center

floating man

love the bowls of grass

don't ask, don't tell

he has the same exact infinity scarf as i do!

i never mentioned how our trip went to seoul. it was a blast. my favorite parts were:

1a. the expensive but delicious galbi and bulgogi.
1b. unlimited, free kimchi
1c. koreans make damn good roasted and baked chicken. one word: hof!
1d. cheap 24 hour fast food places consisting of korean food. much better than McD.
2. my interview and potential job offer.
3. the helpful helpful people when we needed directions or help, esp. on a snowy day.
4. outback steakhouse. no prime rib but pretty decent steak. i think i was just happy to see some thing i haven't seen in almost a year!
5. general politeness and courtesy. coming from china, u really miss and notice this elsewhere.
6. great public transport. the metro was easy to navigate. in english. clean. people get in line and wait their turn. generally. they don't always stand to the right though.
7. people will speak english to you if u don't speak korean to them. signs were in english too. the whole "koreans don't speak english" was a busted myth!
8. ventilation. it was amazing how little we stank after coming out of a korean bbq restaurant with tons of smokers inside.
9. clean cabs, polite cabbies. not terribly expensive compared to U.S. prices at least.
10. samcheong-dong. reminded me of a small and quaint beach town, with tons of class and trend, sorta like sausalito. if i made seoul my home, samcheong would be it.
11. cheap museum admission and late hours. some closed at 7 or 9pm!
12. the seoul animation center, though not all that impressive, was still interesting enough for me.
13. hotel elle inn. i dug our hotel. although our room computer didn't always work, they gave good complimentary green tea/brown rice tea bags and housekeeping was quite efficient! the jacuzzi tub was sorta cool too. rates weren't bad. location was great!
14. Lotte mart. the closest thing to walmart there. they had tons of korean side dishes in vats and even raw galbi. i didn't check for my tampons of choice but if they had that, i would be set! they had great food samples too. yum!
15. the drunk people that come out at night. we saw a drunk guy in a business suit who hurt himself and was talking to himself on the street corner. we saw a drunk girl being manhandled by a dude. then the finale was a mentally ill man with his pants down at the metro station. this made me sad and i told the staff there to go check up on him. this is what prompted me to google psych jobs in seoul and resulted in the interview.
16. free, unlimited, cold and refreshing drinking water carafes at each table. again, coming from china this is a biggie.
17. public toilets. it's so nice not to even have the possibility of opening a stall door and finding a squattie.
18. cute, fashionably dressed children.
19. being mistakened for korean or japanese but never chinese. it was nice not being chinese for one week. :)
20. cute men and women bathroom icons.
21. it was fun to check out korean women's fashion sense. it was even nicer to see that there were heavy chicks in seoul, not all were anorexic ones that we typically see in the states.
22. korean isn't the hardest language in the world to learn. although i still only know a few words and like 2 phrases. dkf did a pretty good job using some common phrases.

what was less than impressive:
1. their imperial palaces. depressing, stark, plain and mostly renovated with little antiquity.
2. korean food overall. i think my biggest disappointment as i was truly a korean food fan. i honestly think the korean chow in the states is much better, and cheaper too!
3. overall sorta doom and gloom atmosphere of buildings and city. this may be a by product of it being winter time.
4. no or non functional escalators. we were convinced this was part of a national health plan. although some metros have escalators, they invariably never worked. most metros had only stairs and pretty damn steep too!
5. i could not find the korean barley tea i loved. i went to the famous tea area and all i found was overpriced non-korean tea. sad.
6. seoul tower. keep walking. not worth it. it was also the most expensive attraction. no outside deck to take non-glarey pictures of the city.
7. people liked to stare at my white bf, especially on the subway. especially older korean men who thought i was a korean dating outside of my race.
8. food generally quite expensive there.

so the verdict is, seoul was pretty spiffy. at first i thought i could live there, then i realized i just wanted to leave shanghai that bad. we probably won't end up moving there but it's always fun to dream..

i definitely left a part of my 'soul' in seoul..

in need of positive chi...

i have concluded that my chi is in dire need of some re-setting and positivity. with all that's been going on lately, i have developed negative chi running through my body causing fatigue, a lack of a sense of a humor, grumpiness, some sadness, and unproductivity. it's time to get zen or get out! the first step is to move out of this apartment because my evil landlord is the largest bringer of the negative chi. i truly believe that in her past life, she was a horrible, horrible creature and this is her payback. after we move out, then we will have more time to make some decisions based on thorough thinking-through. we are once again at a cross-road and will soon decide whether we are leaving china once and for all. being in china reminds me of the hotel in The Shining. you just can't seem to leave! well, i know at the end the mother and child did survive, but that was after much trauma and horror and death! another thing i need to tend to is my health. sometimes i am not sure if my low metabolism and energy is just related to my thyroid or also to my head. plus there is the issue of my high platelet count. i still have no idea what could cause that. i am pretty sure getting into a regular exercise regimen would help me alot. i have neglected the healthy lifestyle for quite sometime now but truly want to get back into that. that means exercise and eating less and healthier. it can be quite a challenge here in china because things tend to be of lower quality and health but it can be done! then there are the little things i still have left to tackle. the headaches such as my tax situation and my meddlesome teeth. i would really like to try some acupuncture but the prices are unbelievable! you would think being in china that wouldn't be a problem but you want to stay safe so you don't want to go to just any acupuncturist! the whole negative chi thing came into mind because i recently went to a training about Mindfulness. it was the most eye opening training because it reminded me of how unmindful i am about everything in my life. i don't stop and smell the roses (or pollution if you're in china). i take things too fast, don't enjoy the small things in life, get lost in the mundaneness and don't see the bigger picture. mindfulness teaches u to slow down and and enjoy each moment. it blends relaxation and breathing and borrows from buddhism. i would like to give it a try. if anyone is interested, i have some slides i can share. just leave a comment.

here's to mindfulness and positive chi.

i can't wait...

for our long awaited 首尔 vacay.
to not be glued to my laptop ALL DAY. ( i secretly hate this thing)
to take a REAL break from work.
to meet interesting people from an interesting culture.
to be completely amazed and/or pissed off but never disappointed.
to try out my awesome new camera using the smile detector and quick clicking and sports features.
to see snow hopefully (the whole roadrunner and wiley coyote scenario it seems).
.
.
.
.
for our next vacation.

2 more days...
An-yŏng-ha-se-yo. 안녕하세요

year of the lao hu.

chinese new year was cool cuz:
it snowed
free fireworks extravaganza show via taxi tour
really good, sorely missed homecooked meal
really cool family.

happy year of the lao hu everyone.

happy v-day.

happy v-day, world.

v-day is about alot of things. it's also about nothing at all. hallmark was quite the genius to create this holiday. but who can deny loving the gifts and sweet things that often times comes with v-day?

thank you my love
for the "coolpix " i can now take
thank you my love
for the yummy steak and potatoes that you did make.
thank you my love
for the huge usb
thank you my love
for all the "memories" i can now keep of you and me.
thank you my love
for the sweets i don't entirely enjoy
thank you my love
for helping me eat them like a good little boy.
thank you my love
for the single pinkish rose
thank you my love
for being there with me when the snow fell and the fireworks rose.

happy chinese new year.
happy v-day.
happy you + me forever day.

i love you. i am glad to spend 3 v-days with you.

why?

why are people so difficult to deal with around here?
why is there a shortage of helpful, kind people and an excess of hateful, dishonest ones?
why doesn't the CNY spirit instill kindness in people's hearts?
why aren't there enough vacation days in LIFE?
why is there so little time to sleep in, enjoy life and dig my toes into warm sand next to turquoise water?
why is it always so cold and wet in this city? on the bright side, hail was pretty neat. made me miss hawaii shave ice.

one can dream..

sigh...

things i need:
1. a lawyer
2. an accountant
3. a personal assistant
4. a vacation that never ends.

things i don't need:
1. an insane, sociopathic landlord
2. tax headaches
3. scam artists swimming around me like piranhas
4. daily deep sighs because this has been one unlucky year so far, day by day.

god, i need a weekend meditation getaway in big sur right about now...

tax season..on second thought.

i would gladly trade in my miniscule fed and state tax returns to avoid the complicated US and China tax process i am enduring now. now i need to find a chinese accountant to save me from tax fraud. turbotax isn't my best friend right now. :(

tax season.

tax season is cool for one reason. returns.

Q of the day.

is too much of a good thing a bad thing?

i never knew alone time could be so divine..

for the love of pug..

once a pug owner, always a pug lover. i just had to share these fotos. found it on a Do It Yourself snow-hat blog.

TS.

i LOVE taylor swift. she makes me want to go out and 'swiftly' get that darn guitar i pass by every day.

to kiwi or not to wi?

to kiwi or not to wi?

brain bomb

been working all day
and all night
can't get my work
out of my sight.
i need a break
haven't seen sunlight
a stroll would be great
but it's way past midnight.
would love some fresh air
hand in hand with my man
except his ETA is unknown
i am not the chinese government's fan.
i have a brain bomb
implosions abound
my neurons have melted
the firings make no sound.

paris is a ferris wheel.

if paris is a ferris wheel, i want to ride.

the niece.

marissa. she can sit without support now. gosh, i can't wait to meet her. i think there are triplets in that house. she looks exactly like her bro and dad.

you're cute
we haven't met
once i see your smile
i know it i will never forget.
your cheeks are like bubbles
clouds in the sky
may you never stop growing
and asking why.
it's a crazy world
but someone's got to live in it
but you will always be loved
this don't you forget.
someday we will meet
and you'll wonder who i am
but the moment you were born
was when my love for you began.

thought of the day

man, i love my dkf. someday, i'm gonna marry him. :)

Lost and unfound.

this weekend absolutely sucked. SUCKED.

it happened to be dkf and my 2 year anniversary. i went shopping at Qi Pu Lu with jingjing, milan and her bf, hoping to get a new coat, socks, scarves, shoes, whatever made me want to empty my wallet. this shopping area is notorious for pickpockets. since it's approaching chinese new year, thieves are out collecting money for their trips home. milan warned me in the morning about the pickpockets on this road. i paid heed but not enough heed.

pineapple sticks. jingjing wanted a second one but ran out of small bills. so i whipped out my wallet, got 3 rmb from the coin pocket and put the wallet back in my purse. we were busy enjoying our pineapple sticks, and daydreaming of ethan hawke in Before Sunrise and Before Sunset. i am the most unobservant and non paranoid person in the world. it wasn't until we were paying for dinner hours later (after gabbing about ethan hawke still) that i reached in my purse and could not find my wallet. i knew i had been robbed and it was when we were by the pineapple stand. i was mega-pissed because i had my social security card in there (don't ask me why), my CA driver's license (again, don't ask me why), 2 credit cards, SH library card (which is worth ALOT), my student ID (which i still use for student discounts), good luck pendants and cards my grandma and mom gave me, my Enjoy card, and tons of cash (i was out shopping, after all). i really just wanted my SS card back the most. i wanted to both cry and choke the living daylights out of the thief. i mostly wanted to choke myself. how could i not be more paranoid, not be more observant, not make sure my purse was in front of me, not notice the pickpocket? i was warned for god sake! it was Qi Pu Lu!! we tried to call the police dept who was sorta useless then went home where i proceeded to call buy.com to cancel and reissue another card, bank of china, and did research on what to do if your SS card is stolen and how to replace it. apparently there's nothing u can do. you can open up a credit line with the SSN and my name. it's out there, circulating in this godforsaken city. i am just grateful there was no account activity on either credit cards. jingjing and i decided to post up reward ads. she wrote it in chinese for me, offering 1000rmb (alot for a poor thief), and asking for help in finding a wallet I had lost (not stolen) with important cards in it. she went back the next morning, and since she could not post posters anywhere, talked to the pineapple vendor, illegally posted up one poster, and alerted the street sweepers who would announce it. it's been 2 days. no word. people tell me it is likely the thief just wanted cash, and probably threw it away after taking that. and even if they found my SS card, they would not be sophisticated enough to know what it is and apply for a new credit line. i am hoping the thief was greedy enough to keep the fairly nice wallet, look thru the cards to see what else he/she could use or sell, but still keep it and then see the ad the next morning and think, hey, i could get more money! but they may be scared of repercussions, like me calling the cops. likely, they just threw the thing away.

it happens to all of us. we all get robbed one way or another. i am so freakin bummed. not to mention the hassle of...everything.

it can only get better.

The Tails of Once Stray Cats.

all species need love.
big or small.
black or white.
furry or hypoallergenic.

this weekend, i spent the morning giving love to furry orphan kitties. some were scratchy, some were shy, some were loving, some were scared, some were healthy, some were lucky to be alive. but all were worth loving. i haven't really been around cats in my life, mostly because growing up we mostly had aquarium animals like fish and turtles. in high school, we got Lucky from the OC Shelter and had dogs for the first time. the first pug entered my life in graduate school and that's when i knew i would be a dog person for life. when i was living with dkf back home, he inherited his sister's cat, who i named Penelope. she was one of the coolest cats i had ever known, and one of the few. she's the first cat that made me begin to appreciate the idiosyncrasies and doglike-ness of cats.

we took a 45 minute van ride out to Bao Shan, on the outskirts of shanghai on sunday morning. when we got there, we entered a shack house in the middle of the countryside, right behind a military facility. there we encountered 4-5 stray dogs that were taken in by the owners but were originally strung out to die, said the owners. i was sad that we were not able to play with them b/c most did not seem socialized. there were 2 pekingnese and some larger dogs. then we entered the cat area. there were at least 100 cats there, we were told. the man who lived there began taking in cats but could not resist taking in more and more of them. so he ended up with a patio, 3 rooms and a loft full of cats. many were so dirty, a contrast to the neat freak nature of cats. most had colds and were sneezing the whole time, with snot on their noses. they loved to bask in the sun, their eyes closed, their bodies sprawled out, smiling. it was so adorable. many crawled up on people's laps and looked right at home. some scratched me when i tried to pet them or groom them or just wanted to sharpen their claws. some ran away as i approached. they came in all different shapes and sizes and species and had different faces. they each had their own character. if each cat could tell his/her story, what an interesting book that would make..The Tails of Once Stray Cats. oh but it smelled so awful there. their blankets and beds were soiled and reeked of feces and cat spray. the floors and walls were drenched with urine and cat spray. there were feces scattered. throw up here and there. some cats had such rotten teeth, there was yellow puss foaming out of their mouths. some cats had worms that covered up their poopholes. but they had such amazing eyes. one had a blue and green eye. and my favorite cat cuz he's my hero..a cat with nerve damage that would walk a little bit in a crooked path then fall over and do it all over again. he was such a trooper! SCAA, Second Chance Animal Aid, actually pays for the medical bills, provides food, and toys and supplies to these cats. they have different projects in the area. It is a private, non-profit organization committed to protecting and improving the health and welfare of companion animals through education, health care, advocacy, outreach, adoption and the promotion of foster care as an alternative approach to traditional shelters. We believe it is the right of every companion animal to have a safe, healthy life in a loving home. read more about SCAA.

the owners are amazing too. one man and one woman lived there. they had no hot water. only his room has heat. it was freezing there too. the woman spent the entire time handwashing the dirty blankets and linens because their washer was too small. you do not know what true cold is until you have washed your hand in cold shanghai water. it literally throbs and is very painful. and to think, she does laundry all day with her bare hands, which looked weathered and red. SCAA is now fundraising to purchase an industrial size washer so they can wash the blankets more readily. there were too many to count and all so dirty. bless their hearts for taking in these animals that would have died otherwise. although they don't get much human contact besides volunteer visits, at least they have a home and the company of so many brothers and sisters.

thank you kitties for touching my life. i hope i touched yours too, even for a second. you will stay in my heart. i hope to see you next time.

random thoughts.

so i'm starting a new blahg called Dietry, which will be a diary for my diet. i wanna start keeping track of what i eat and how much i eat for each meal, how much water i drink, and how much exercise i am getting. plus i wanna keep track of the other "end" of things, if u catch my drift.

why do people stare and stare when they see a chinese ayi with a white or half white baby, as if by staring long and hard enough, the baby will turn chinese and it will make more sense?

i was having dinner with my language partner and we were conversing in english. the waiter comes up and asks if one of us is not chinese. sarah points to me and says i'm american. the waiter asks, is she japanese or korean? i say in chinese, "i'm actually chinese-american." then he says in english, "nice to meet you."

ok, i now say goodnight to planet earth.

2 years at 2am.

in case you can't read it, it says, "you leave fingerprints..on my heart."

this will be the 2nd year in a row that dkf and I will be spending our anniversary apart. in fact, we have yet to spend a single one together! it was a tough year for the two of us but i am super-jazzed and grateful that we have spent 2 years of our lives together as boyfriend-girlfriend. here's to many more. and here are some drawings i did as an anniversary gift. love you baby. can't wait til you come home.

kids say the darndest things

i got burgers in my nose!
your hair is broken! (referring to my short bangs)
read, please! (impatient as i was just staring at the cool pictures in her storybook)
kitty starts with a C of course.

some of chloe-speak. i think some of this was just my imagination too!

It's Chloe time!

loungin'

my milky's coming!

cowin' around

frog stance

snake!

snaking around with nana!

the snake takes a bite outta nana!

squirmy little snake

beware of the snake!

froggie!

pretty pink tea set. oolong, anyone?

skippity do dah

striking a move

I had the privilege to spend some girl time with Miss Chloe, a Chinese/American princess rock star! Not only was she the cutest little 3 y.o. wasian with the biggest persuasion in all of Shanghai, she was a rock star and dancer, could impersonate any animal, could do the tummy roll bellydance, knew all her letters and numbers and could count to 30, and could get herself into her nighties all by herself! I nearly ate her too but really just wanted to take her home. Most importantly, she made me all broody all over again!